Worth a look – not the same old, same ol

Worth a look – not the same old, same old.
http://ow.ly/f9Gv3099gkV

The Not-So-Tricky Trick Interview Question

The academic interview process is grueling.  “Short” interviews last a full day, with more typical interview schedules covering two or more days. Included in the schedule are meetings, teaching sessions and discussions about research and teaching philosophy, as well as a group faculty meeting where the candidate is grilled en masse on all of the above. It was at one such faculty meeting that I experienced my Worst Interview Question Ever:

“What’s your favorite book?”

At face value it seems an innocuous enough question. After all, academics typically are voracious readers so the titles should roll off the tongue, right?

Let me step back for a moment. We’re book people in my family. My mother was a librarian for thirty-plus year so books regularly appeared in our house like year-round Christmas gifts.  Half my childhood was spent in the library where I learned to shelf books before I reached double-digits, and by middle school I was the unofficial story time assistant. When I learned to drive, on the rare occasion I was gifted use of a car it was with the condition that I stop and empty the book drop in front of the Borough Hall. And whenever anyone left the house for an appointment my mother would call out “Do you have a book?!”, and – of course – we always did.

So when someone at that inordinately large, round table where sixteen faculty members sat staring at me asked “What’s your favorite book?”, it’s reasonable to think that any one of the literally thousands of books I’ve read might come to mind.

Not. A. One.

“What’s…my….favorite…book?” I stammered back in an attempt to buy myself some time. The issue wasn’t that I couldn’t think of a book, it was that I couldn’t think of a worthy book. To say a book is my favorite or the best I’ve read is to offer the highest praise that can be bestowed  and not to be taken lightly. There are so many genres and time periods and authors to consider – how can just one book take the prize?  If I watch a movie that’s bad I’ll walk out, but it takes a lot for me not to finish a book. It might sit on my nightstand for months, but eventually I’ll get to it. The characters are in my head and their woes and struggles call out to me until one day I pick it up, dust it off and settle into my comfy chair. The only book I can remember not being able to make it through was Atlas Shrugged (and I’m okay with that).

Fortunately, on this day I got a reprieve. One of the faculty members spoke up and said “I’m a pretty well-read guy but I’d be hard-pressed to come up with my favorite book.”  His comment spurred a side discussion which gave me the time I needed to regroup.

At the next gap in the conversation I  offered my delayed response: “I would have to say that my favorite book is Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.”  (Synopsis: The youngest, redhead sibling gets picked on by his family and the world – I could relate!) I expanded my answer to include an academic article to reestablish my credibility and bring us back to the reason I was there. We moved on, but that seemingly infinite five-minute period made a lasting impression on me.

Immediately following that interview I sent out a mass email asking friends and family for their favorite titles so that I would be at the ready if the question should be asked again. But if I was asked that question again today, even after reading several of the recommendations offered and probably another few hundred books,  I’d still be hard-pressed to come up with a favorite. And I’m okay with that.

#readabook     #bookadayonthebeach      #livevicariously      #interviewprep      #AMPlified

Bring us Your Best, 2016!

As so many of us do as we get ready to start a new year, I find myself reflecting back on all that happened in 2015. Oh what a year it was!

Bypassing politics altogether, the “top” and most frequently recurring new stories were sadly and overwhelmingly negative. Violent attacks on human life; the worst humanitarian crisis in our lifetime (for most of us); and fires and  floods of biblical proportions continue to dominate the news even in these last hours of the year. Terrorist attacks in Paris and San Bernardino along with seeming daily school shootings reminds us that our idyllic lives could be shattered at any moment, in any place.

Yet despite what seemed to be a never-ending barrage of horror stories, we still saw the better part of humanity consistently emerged. Students protected one another during shootings, both on and off campuses. After an Amtrak train derailed, killing eight passengers and injuring hundreds more, residents near the crash site rushed to aid the victims and continued to open their homes to journalists covering the accident.  Random acts of kindness changed lives forever; and the bond between Americans and the French was strengthened by shared pain, sorrow and senseless loss.

And not all the news was bad.

England welcomed a new princess, and while no one baby is any more precious than another, Charlotte’s birth had the distinction of marking a major change in the British monarchy: she is the first female heir to the throne who cannot be bumped by a male relative, putting her fourth in line to the crown, after her older brother, father and grandfather. You go, Little C – represent!

Pope Francis brought an calming peace during his visit; Cuba and the United States met and played nicely together; and it’s possible that we (or our descendants’ descendants) might vacation on Mars! The light continues to shine!

So, as we count down the hours and move toward a new year and new opportunities, keep the light! I wish you peace, joy and prosperity in whatever form that may take in your lives, and all the best that 2016 can offer!

#2016WillRock     #PeopleAreGood     #BeTheChange     #AMPlified

#sharekindness

Today is World Kindness Day.  Who knew?!

Far be it from me to ignore an important international day sanctioned by the Random Acts of Kindness Foundation (yes, it is real), so I welcome the opportunity to give a shout out to recognize some of the many random acts of kindness I have witnessed.  Some names have been changed to preserve the identify of those who choose to remain anonymous.

Many years ago when I was in my impressionable 20’s I was visiting my good friend Dana at just about this time of year. When I was leaving she asked if I could drop something in her brother-in-law’s mailbox. I told her I’d be happy to do it but asked why she didn’t do it herself since she saw her in-laws regularly. Dana told me that work had been slow for him and that they had been struggling financially and she wanted to make sure her nieces and nephews had a good Christmas, so she wanted me to drop off a stack of Toys R Us gift cards she had bought. At the time this happened Dana had two small children of her own and was in school, and while her family may not have been struggling, they were hardly among the rich and famous. I had seen this type of grand gesture on much-hyped holiday TV specials but it didn’t occur to me that “regular” people, who might just be making ends meet themselves, did the same thing. I was humbled to play that small role in her random act of generosity and kindness. So impactful was this experience for me that some ten years later when I learned of a family in a similar situation, I knew I had to follow suit. I was in graduate school at the time and working only part time, but Dana had planted the pay-it-forward seed and I felt like I had been waiting for this moment to arrive. The giving truly was the gift and it left me with so much more than I had beforehand.

For some people kindness seems to be natural attribute, like great eyes or a nice smile. My friend Sue has this gift. Every so often Sue sends me a card – an actual paper card, in the mail. With so much of our existence taking place in the cloud these days, “real” mail seems nearly obsolete and something other than a bill is a rare treat. Mail from Sue is even more special because she always encloses something special: a funky potholder, a mini-flashlight, beach-themed air fresheners and lottery tickets have been among my surprises. It doesn’t matter if it’s a card, a gift or both, it always makes my day better, and I think that that helps me make other people’s day better. A mutual friend told me that Sue also stops by her house and hides small gifts for her children in the mailbox. While most of us struggle to squeeze in a minute to return a text or pick up a phone, Sue manages to find time to stop in a store, buy stamps and make deliveries, and in doing so brightens the day of those who are honored to be in her radius. She also has great eyes and a nice smile.

My friends aren’t the only cool kids around. I used to live in D.C. and had an established tour for guests who visited. Some friends and I were visiting the Vietnam War Memorial  one night (which is the best time to see it – I highly recommend it for your next visit) and an older man with paper and pencil in his hands was reaching up to do an etching of someone’s name but it was clearly beyond his reach.  Without speaking, two other men came up behind him and lifted him on their shoulder so that he could reach. When he was done there was silent nodding and they were gone. I still get a lump in my throat when I think about it.

Though the news might have you believe otherwise, these and so many other acts happen around us all the time. It’s up to us to take the time to notice and acknowledge them, and more importantly, to be inspired by them to pay it forward ourselves.  There’s still time today to “share kindness.” And if you don’t make today, no worries, there are no deductions if you’re a day (or week, or month) late.

#sharekindness      #payitforward     #randomacts     #bethankful     #AMPlified

Bond. Wayne Bond.

Recently I was teaching a class on servant leadership. Servant leaders put the needs of others ahead of their own; and among the ways this is measured is though observing whether those who are being served grow as individuals, and if they become better people (and thus better servants) themselves.  In trying to come up with examples, I recalled a bittersweet memory of an early influence in my life.  Dr. Wayne Bond taught, and more importantly, showed me that how you treat people can come back to you.

Wayne was perhaps one of the best instructors I’ve ever had and certainly one of the kindest people I’ve been fortunate to know. He also exemplifies just about all of the characteristics of a servant leader. On the last day of my undergraduate college career I was late for my final exam. Really, really late. I cried for the hour plus commute (in a pre-cell phone age) as I saw what little of my future I dared to imagine fade into nothingness. As I ran through the virtually abandoned campus and into the classroom the only indication that people had been there was a stack of empty pizza boxes, a student named Jim looking blankly at his test paper and Wayne, who just smiled and handed me my exam and accepted my final paper without question. I turned in my exam (before Jim) and walked down the hall with Wayne telling him about my agonizing car ride and my absolute certainty that he would, justifiably, deny me the opportunity to take the exam.  He looked at me and said “Did you really think I wouldn’t let you take it?”

As soon as the words were out of his mouth I knew I had been a fool. Of course he would let me take the exam – why wouldn’t he? To teach me a lesson? To cause me (more!) anxiety and stress? To have an excited, new graduate finish her (already extended!) college career on a failing note – literally and figuratively?!  While he certainly could have cited his, or university policy to deny me the ability to take the exam he instead chose to focus on the person over policy.  This demonstration of understanding, generosity, forgiveness, and compassion made a lifelong impression on me.

Some years later I found myself in a similar situation. One morning I received a desperate phone message from a student who had slept through the exam and was seeking a make-up opportunity.  My first reaction was to be irritated (how dare he sleep through my exam!) but the memory of my own final exam nightmare prevailed and I, of course, agreed to a make-up.  I’m no Wayne Bond, but my hope is that one day my student might look fondly back on his experience and pay it forward, and perhaps even become a servant leader in his own way.

#servantleader     #payitforward     #undergradmemories     #AMPlified

Say it Ain’t So, Jeff

The company we love, or the company we love to hate?

By now, the buzz created by an expose of Amazon’s oppressive organizational culture is starting to fade.  In case you missed it, according to the NY Times, Jeff Bezos, the founder and CEO of Amazon, is running a sweat shop.

Among the accusations – and this isn’t the first time they’ve been put forward – is the use of GPS to monitor employees and ensure peak productivity; a demerit system for being sick, late (i.e., one minute after a scheduled start time), or not achieving unrealistic goals; and expectations of an unequivocal commitment to work (as in “Family? What family?”).

This from the world’s largest retailer, with a value of $246 billion (that billion, with a “B”), whose CEO is the 5th richest person in the world with a net worth of $50.3 billion (again, “B”). And with continued growth forecast over at least the next five years, Amazon isn’t going anywhere anytime soon.

So why are they so mean?

When you and your company are doing better than pretty much everyone everywhere in the world, what percentage of your billions do you actually risk if it takes an extra 40 seconds to fill an order? How much does it really hurt the bottom line if you were to be more compassionate to your employees with serious illnesses? Must reaching your goal “to be Earth’s most customer-centric company” come at the expense of your greatest resource, your employees?

If we were reading this about another company we would be incensed and ask how they can get away with it. But it’s not any company, it’s Amazon: America’s go-to source for everything from our first cup of coffee to the bed we sleep in, and virtually anything else we might want in a day. Our moral high ground becomes shaky when our two-day shipping is threatened (especially if it’s through Prime and it’s free!). And why should they change when the likelihood of a consumer ban is virtually nil because let’s face it, low prices and convenience trumps “allegations” of poor treatment every time?

This silently condoned behavior poses a challenge for those of us who advocate for positive workplace relationships…but also want our new phone case delivered in two days (with free shipping, of course). Although Mr. Bezos and some supportive employees refute the allegations, it’s clear he could use a refresher on the Golden Rule. Perhaps a Shark Tank-like intervention in which he spends a few days fulfilling orders in a warehouse; or performs a role-reversal and negotiates a publishing deal on behalf of one of the many independent authors trying to catch a break on Amazon might open his eyes to the very real challenges being faced outside the C-suite. Come on, @JeffBezos, make them write a retraction! For now, focusing on the “human” over the “resource” would be a good start.

#Amazon    #JeffBezos    #trybeingEMPLOYEEcentric    #AMPlified

Turnaround

For a new twist on the topic of relationship-building, here’s a perspective that I’m guessing most of us haven’t experienced.  Danny Trejo has an impressive resume: drug addict, armed robber, convict, boxer, actor; and a face you’ve probably seen in at least a dozen movies even if you don’t know his name.

While in one of many prisons he went through a 12-step program that he credits with changing his life. In this short video clip created by AARP he talks about his life before and after drugs, and how he became one of the most prolific actors in the movie business (183 and counting!). While we all know people who were “in the right place at the right time,” his story has some unique aspects. For example, his first movie appearance resulted from him going to a movie set to offer support to someone he was sponsoring, where he ran into another ex-con (turned screenwriter).  I’m guessing parole officers might not encourage this particular type of relationship, but in this case it worked – and in a big way!  Initially asked to be an extra, he instead became Eric Roberts’ boxing coach, and ultimately was hired to play Eric’s boxing opponent in the film.

Two things struck me about his story. First, he is adamant that “everything good that has happened to [him] has happened as a direct result of helping someone else.”  I think most of allow ourselves a moment of indulgent pride and usefulness when we do a good deed, but let’s face it, making it a lifestyle is a lot of work. (Sometimes making it happen at all is too much to fit into a day!) Second, he continues to be appreciative of all that he has in life. He says that he prays every day that he will continue to sign each autograph and shake every hand that is put in front of him. This recognition of and gratitude for even the smallest  gestures is a reminder that his life could have gone in an entirely different direction with a much less desirable outcome. Even for the non-celebrities among us, this is something that we might all consider now and again.

Danny Trejo gets my shout-out for paying back and forward; and for maximizing the value of his reputation to promote his “just say no” message to  the many potential, would-be Mini-Me’s who are tempted to follow his early example and end up living (missing?) life from the big house.

(One last thought: Great video, but what madness is happening among the 50+ crowd in America that AARP felt the need to produce this particular video and message??!  )

#DannyTrejo    #12step     #BeTheChange   #AARPInspires     #AMPlified

Baby steps

When I saw this headline I immediately checked the source to see if it was The Onion. Once I ascertained its legitimacy, I actually got a little chill:  this is what I’m talking about! Sir Richard gets it! He’s a genuine and authentic RB (relationship-builder!). Richard Branson, owner and most recognized face of the Virgin Group, is offering one year of fully paid maternity leave to moms and dads.

Granted, there are some “catches” to this policy, such as it’s (currently??) only available in the U.K. and Geneva, and employees must be employed at least four years with the company in order to take advantage.  While it would be nice to see the policy equally available to employees in all locations, I don’t think four years of employment is a ridiculous restriction, especially since employees with shorter tenure are still eligible for partial pay.

Still, this is a very generous policy that reflects genuine appreciation for employees and recognition of the importance of post-birth family bonding time (to say nothing of what a woman has to do to bring that sweet bundle of joy into the world). This policy may not be perfect or address the host of inequities that abound in some workplaces, but it is a leap in the right direction, and one that other companies with similar resources should look to as a model. I encourage them to rise to the challenge of shaming Sir Richard by creating their own generous policies (you read it here first)!

(8/18/15 update: Netflix has jumped on the bandwagon and now also offers unlimited time off to new parents for the first year after their child is born or adopted. Who will be next?!)

#SirRichard  #VirginAirlines  #Familyfirst  #Whocandobetter? #Netflix     #AMPlified

Leading by Example (…or Not!)

A key aspect to relationship-building is the development of “communal relationships“. These occur when both parties help each other just because they can; there is no expectation of reciprocation. Posts in this section highlight people who go above and beyond their job description to do something to make a situation better…and those who don’t.

#AMPlified

Doing the Right Thing

Some people and organizations really know what to do to build relationships with their customers.  Just like the voice in Kevin Costner’s head told him: “If you build it they will come,” those companies that establish genuine, mutually beneficial relationships know that it leads to much more than another sale or a “like” on Facebook.  If you do right by your customers just because it’s the right thing to do, they will come…and maybe they’ll even bring their friends!

There are some people who just get it.  There was the pilot who bought pizza for all his passengers when his plane was grounded due to bad weather. We all know that time on the tarmac is disproportionate to actual time by a factor of at least 100, and while tequila might be our first preference, pizza certainly helps!  And there’s Zappo’s, who paid everyone’s toll on a stretch of the Massachusetts’ Turnpike on the day before Thanksgiving.  Every minute not waiting in a line helps when you’re trying to get those creamed onions to grandma’s house!

Then there are those at whom we shake our head in amazement at how much they don’t get it:  “Seriously?! You thought that was a good idea?!”  But no need to bring them into this (we’ll save that for another day!).

#FrontierAirlines  #Zappos     #AMPlified